Mental Health MON + More!

Grand-Kids are the best...So is Nebraska...Going Mental Instead of Postal

Things That Cause Joy *

* Or at least much happiness

Conversations w/Grand-Children . . . A Recurring Theme

This conversation was reported by my daughter Rachel to my wife Lois. Rachel called to tell Lois that Bentley, our 4-year-old grandson, would be singing in church this SUN 12/17.

• Rachel:  "What song are you going to sing?"
• Bentley:  "A B C D E F G . . . "

There Is No Place Like Nebraska

On SAT 12/16, the Lady Husker VB team obliterated the University of FL, 3-1, to win a 5th national championship. I think this ties the VB program with the FB program for total # of national championships. [I don't want to sound patronizing to my Floridian relatives.] *
* Who Am I kidding? I don't really care. **
** Apathy, a symptom of depression. SEE comments that follow. 

Time with Grand-Children

• On FRI 12/15, Lois & i were privileged to attend Hadley's (2nd grade) Christmas program at Trinity Lincoln. The children sang with gusto!
• I am looking forward to Brianna's (8th grade) Christmas concert at Lincoln Lutheran tonite (12/18).

Things That Cause Distress *

* This list is obviously longer. I'm pretty sure that I've had a relapse re:  my clinical depression & diagnosed anxiety disorder. [SEE comments below.] You've been warned.

Mental Health Update

Last March (2017) I felt that I was at a mental health high point. I officially retired from Lutheran High Northeast. I felt a large degree of closure. I felt great about writing for Orphan Grain Train . . . Then things started to go downhill.

• I had a recurrence of cluster headaches in the spring. [I've had cluster headaches off & on for probably at least 15 years. [Google cluster headaches to find out my I loathe them & why they are especially "deadly" from those suffering from depression & anxiety.]
• Not long after that I began suffering symptoms that were obvious to both me & those close who spent time. These symptoms could have been neurological-related. They could have been related to the side effects of some(?) of my medications.
• My neurologist had increased one of my medications in the spring when I just couldn't seem to shake my cluster headaches.
• After running me through a series of neurological tests, he was confident that my symptoms were NOT the result of neurological issues. He was pretty confident that the symptoms were the result of the increased dosage of a medication which he had prescribed last spring at double the dosage.
• After tapering off this medication, I also had my psychiatric nurse provider eliminate and/or lower the dosages of some of my psychotropic medications.
• There was gradual improvement, & by early this fall I could see improvements that were also obvious to those around me.
• Unfortunately, cluster headaches returned to plague me in the fall, which resulted in my neurologist adding a daily dose of a medication normally used only at the onset of a headache.
• Also unfortunately, over the course of the last 6-8 weeks, I have had a relapse, experiencing many of the same symptoms as before.
• Within the last 2 weeks or so, I have experienced some of the same neurological symptoms that I had experienced before.

I see my nurse provider this WED 12/20. Next month I will head to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester for the Executive Health Program. 

• I participated in this program some years ago. 
• I will have an appointment with a Mayo neurologist. 
• I will also have an appointment with a Mayo pharmacologist.

Just a Reminder:  One of the reasons that I blog is the mental health benefit that I get from writing. Today's entry has the feel of self-therapy & not a solicitation of advice or information which might help others. *

* HOWEVER, I always welcome your feedback, suggestions, questions, etc.

Political TUE on MON

I try & try & try, & then . . . I try some more. Browsing for partisan content, whether in print or Internet media, is not necessarily helpful for my mental health. Still, those on BOTH sides of the political spectrum keep trying to provoke an end to my silence.

• Seriously? After 8 years of B.O. adding to our national deficit w/nary a word of protest from those on the "progressive" side, now the Democrats are concerned w/a tax plan that adds to our deficit? 
• Allegations of sexual misconduct will continue to come out. And they will point to "celebrities" on BOTH sides of the political spectrum. 
• However, it's distressing to me that the following "game" keeps being played . . . BY both sides.

Right side:  Ha! One of yours got caught red-handed!
Left side:  Ha! Ha! One of yours got caught more red-handed-er!
Right:  Oh, yeah? Well, your guy got caught first!
Left:  Oh, yeah? Well, your guy got caught WORSE!
Right:  Oh, yeah? [Ad infinitum.]
Left:  Yeah? [Ad infinitum.] *
* Now that I've read over this conversation several times, I'm finding it not very witty. However, I put too much time & effort into it to delete it. And it's my blog, remember?

This reminds me of the excuse that our children used to give when confronted w/bad behavior.

• "Why should I be punished when _______ (fill in the blank) did the same thing & didn't get punished."
• "Because you are responsible for your own behavior, & it doesn't matter whether ___________ got caught or punished."

One last political note aimed at one side of the political spectrum. Why do a former president (BC) & his spouse, SWSNBN *, seem to be above the law for just about everything, weather it's sexual misconduct, collusion, etc.?
* She Who Shall Not Be Named **
** In my defense, I have not used this sobriquet at all--to the best of my memory [which is always a shaky endeavor] since the November election.

I Miss My Dad

TUE 12/19 will be or would have been my father's 91st birthday. I rejoice that he is in heaven with our Lord & Savior. It still saddens me that he died in 2007, w/o ever meeting 3 of our grand-kids. I'm glad that he & Mom got acquainted w/our youngest grand-daughter & really looked forward to our visits w/her.