mental health Mon 9/5
GENERAL CAVEAT: If you are reading this from the link from the Norfolk Daily News, you are almost certainly not taking advantage of all my special features, namely headings & subheadings, numbered & bulleted lists, colors, bold-faced, underlined, italicized & specially-sized fonts, & more. [I used to include more links on my blog but have stopped including those for that reason.] DO NOT BLAME the NDN for this. The NDN is still--by far--despite my referencing other newspapers, the best newspaper, by far, that I quote on a regular basis. Plus, I know you can get to my blog by other methods. I'm just not sure how to send you to those other places. Plus, if you use the NDN site, you have a better chance of going to other NDN sites, which I also enthusiastically recommend. On the other hand, you can get to the Norfolk Daily News web site & get to those same outstanding features by clicking onto ndn.com. I'm just sayin.'
Self-Compassion *
*SOURCE: The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be & Embrace Who You Are {Your Guide To a WholeHearted Life}, by Brene' Brown, Ph.D., L.M.S.W. (Hazelden), 2010"'The thing that is really hard, & really amazing, is giving up on being perfect & beginning the work of becoming yourself.' (Anna Quindlen) . . . Where perfectionism exists, shame is always lurking. In fact, shame is the birthplace of perfectionism . . .
"We don't claim shame. You can't believe how many times I've heard that! I know shame is a daunting word. The problem is that when we don't claim shame, it claims us. And one of the ways it sneaks into our lives is through perfectionism. As a recovering perfectionist & an aspiring good-enoughist, I've found it extremely helpful to bust some of the myths about perfectionism so that we can develop a definition that accurately captures what it is & what is does to our lives.
- "Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. Perfectionism is not about healthy achievement & growth. Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect, & act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of name, judgment, & shame. It's a shield. Perfectionism is a 20-ton shield that we log around thinking it will protect us when, in fact, it's the thing that's really preventing us from taking flight.
- "Perfectionism is not self-improvement. Perfectionism is, at its core, about trying to earn approval ^& acceptance. Most perfectionists were raised being praised for achievement & performance (graces, manners, rule-following, people-pleasing, appearance, sports). Somewhere along the way, we adopt this dangerous & debilitating believe system: I am what I accomplish & how well I accomplish it. Please. Perform. Perfect. Healthy striving is self-focused--How can I improve? Perfection is other-focused--What will they think?" [Emphases in original.]
MY COMMENTS: Continue
G.O.M.E.R. *
* Grumpy Old Men & Their Elucidating Rants- Omaha World Herald (column by Marck Thiessen via Washington Post 9/1): "Why no #NeverHillary Democrats? Dozens of notable Republicans have said that they will not vote for Donald Trump, including at least 6 senators, 2 governors, the 2012 GOP nominee & a group of 50 former national security officials who served Republican presidents from 'He-Who-Was-Not-a-Crook' to GWB, among others. Sos where are the #NeverHillary Democrats?" [Maybe my comments below re: a certain NFL quarterback who I've labeled as "immature, self-deluded, politically naive, & of questionable intelligence" could apply to these same Democrats . . . but I hate to be judgmental.] *
- OWH (9/2): "Kaepernick's protest of 'rogue cops' extends to socks. SF 49ers quarterback 'He-Who-Is-Immature-Self-Deluded-Politically-Naive-&-Ungrateful-to-the-Country-that-Has-Allowed-Him-Freedom-of-Speech-&-the-Means-to-Become-Rich-Despite-His-Questionable-Intelligence-' said he has been wearing socks depicting police officers as pigs in protest of 'rogue cops' who put the community & other officers at risk." [I can neither confirm nor deny that "rogue cops" have taken to wearing socks w/"HWIISDPNAUTTCTHAHFOSATMTBRDHQI" depicting him as a sheep.]
* Said the person obviously being judgmental.
Reasons to be a little sad . . . but not depressed
OWH (8/30): "Wilder, zany & beloved, dies at 83. Gene Wilder, the frizzy-haired actor who brought his deft comedic touch to such unforgettable roles as the neurotic accountant in 'The Producers' & the mad scientist of 'Young Frankenstein,' has died . . . " [My favorite Gene Wilder movies, ranked in order. How does this list compare to yours?]- Young Frankenstein
- Blazing Saddles [Brought back wonderful memories of watching this movie w/friends in Chicago. We were laughing & repeating the funniest lines so loud that the theater manager approached us, wondering if someone in our group was so offended that he/she wanted a refund. No . . . we did not.]
- Stir Crazy
- The Producers
- Silver Streak
- Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory
- Norfolk Daily News (9/1): "On 'Newhart.' Jack Riley, who played a counseling client on 'The Bob Newhart Show' & also voiced a character on Nickelodeon's animated 'Rugrats' has died. The 80-yr-old actor died in L.A. . . . " [One of my favorite characters on one of my favorite TV comedies of all times.] *
- * And, according to family corrects, Bob Newhart is a distant relative on the Handel side of the family tree.
- NDN (8/31): "Steven Hill, a versatile character actor in theater, films & TV who achieved his greatest success late in life as grumpy D.A. Adam Schiff on Tv'ed long-running 'Law & Order,' has died. He was 94 . . . ' [Also a favorite TV drama, which Lois & I watched regularly for many years thru many character changes . . . Sadly, in its later years there was a tone of political correctness that we found off-putting. Adam Schiff, RIP.]
Reasons to be at least mildly anxious, unsettled, irritated, depressed
Lincoln Journal Star (9/3): "Police losing war against texting. State troopers in Chattanooga, TN, have been known to patrol in a tractor-trailer so they can sit up high & spot drivers texting behind the wheel . . . " [Unsettling for at least 2 reasons . . . We've almost been the victims of DDWT * at least once or twice & if you live in Chattanooga, now you have to reckon w/ state troopers--driving semi's--distracted while watching for drivers who are texting.]
NDN (9/3): "Bill Nye on Netflix (9/3): "Bill Nye is going to be a Netflix guy. The streaming network announced plans WED to launch a series, 'Bill Nye Saves the World,' hosted by the famed scientist, author & TV personality. Each episode will tackle a chosen topic from a scientific point of view in an effort to dispel myths & refute anti-scientific claims that may be muddling the issue. Topics will include vaccinations, genetically modified foods & climate change . . . " [Bill Nye is a bogus, questionably quasi- self-appointed, self-appointed scientist. I foresee bad things ahead for fuzzy headed millennials & their impressionable children who will be flummoxed by what's sure to be a fuzzy-headed Netflix series.] **
* Drivers driving while texting
** Maybe this would have been better suited above under G.O.M.E.R.
Reasons why I am definitely feel depressed & more anxious than usual these days
- I think I mentioned several weeks ago that my insurance company (not CPS) informed me that I no longer met the criteria for a mental health disability. I was informed that due to this decision, I would no longer qualify for health insurance, effective 9/1/16. I was informed by phone with just a few days left during the last week of August. I received the official letter, which included information re: how to appeal this decision, postmarked 9/2/16. Obviously, this left me no time to appeal the decision, by which I can obtain "emergency" health insurance while my disability status is reviewed. As of today [MON 9/5], I apparently am still lacking any health insurance. This greatly distresses me. [Oh, me of little faith.]
- I also found out that there is a 2-year limit to my mental health claim, which will expire in November 2016. My long-term mental health disability went into effect the first week of November 2014. I think I've also mentioned that {1}, this is when I effectively "lost" my position as head administrator at Lutheran High Northeast; {2} I always expected that sooner or later I would lose my mental health disability status; and {3} I also always felt that I would achieve some measure of closure when I lost my disability status, which would enable me to apply to change my status on the LCMS Commissioned Ministers Roster from "inactive" back to "active," thereby giving me more options.
- Well, I must tell you . . . now that this is all coming to pass, I seem to have slipped into a depressive episode again--one that I seemed to be climbing out of around a month ago--the current episode marked once again by more gloominess, anxiety, trouble sleeping, & OCD behaviors. [More on that below.]
- Why am I telling you all this? I promise that I'm NOT trying to garner your pity. * I'm reminding you--which I've done ad nauseum--that a major reason I write in general & blog specifically is for self-therapy . . . so, caveat emptor. **
* Which I gladly always leave for you to be the judge of.
** And I love flaunting my multi-lingual talents(?!)
I almost forgot . . . Reasons to be optimistic & upbeat
- While I was on the road last SAT 9/3, returning from the Nebraska State Fair in Grand Island, I spotted one of the license plates that Lois & I still need to complete our 2016 acquisitions . . . Connecticut! Although we are still missing Hawaii, New Hampshire, & Vermont, we will be traveling to Grand Rapids, MI, next month for the L.E.A. National Convocation, & we are planning a trip to Wichita Falls, TX, over Christmas/New Year's. You may recall that during a stop in OK City on a trip to WF in 2014, we picked up our last state that year (LA) in a parking lot at a mall with two days left in the calendar year.
- I had an overall great time at the NE State Fair in Grand Island, THU 9/1 & SAT 9/1. Working at the Lutheran Laymen's League/Lutheran Hour Ministries Booth was extremely rewarding, including several "God talks" w/a few people, including children. I also noticed Trump/Pence stickers & t-shirts & literature. As I departed the main entrance on FRI night, I paused to "people watch" & noticed a few people leaving w/"Trump Pence" yard signs. I think I remember seeing a little evidence of Libertarian & Green Party supporters. I honestly do NOT recall seeing any evidence of the other party's candidate. Although I do not--as of yet--count myself among "He-Who-Has-Now-Thoroughly-Confused-Former-Hispanic-Supporters-&-Military-Experts," I was still greatly bemused.
I must confess a couple of regrets.
Chris Tomlin concert: I was at the Fair for about 4 hours on THU 9/1 . . . I could have stayed for Chris Tomlin's concert at 7:30p but ran out of steam. After reading some awesome reviews, including some postings on Facebook [KUDOs to Lisa Moreno!], I regret wimping out, especially since I stayed up late that night to do a blog once I got to my motel in St. Paul, NE, anyway. [Not gonna do a hotel rating by the way. Draw your own conclusions.]
Grand Island Independent (9/2): "Chicks w/axes: Lumberjills chop it up at State Shows. Polar wood chips flew as a packed crowd cheered on the Lumpberjills at the NE State Fair. Nearly 200 people attended the afternoon show on THU. Chop, chop. Clack, clack . . . " [Alas, although I was at the Fair on THU, I wasn't aware of this competition, & I missed it.]
G.I.I. (9/2): "To some people, the NE State Fair is a deep-friend Oreo. Food is definitely one of the major draws of the NE State Fair, especially the deep-friend variety. Josh & Trea Stone of Kearney weren't going to leave the fair on THU until they made one important acquisition. 'Got to have a friend Oreo,' Trea said. Would she share her Oreo w/her husband? 'I don't share my Oreo,' she said. 'Good way to lose a finger,' Josh said . . . At around noon THU, Echo Hernandez & Kylee Carstens of Columbus had each had a deep-fried Snickers . . . " [Despite a plethora of other deep-fried temptations, I passed them all up. *
* I know what I was feeling . . . What was I thinking?
Speaking of OCD symptoms
OWH (9/5): "Paper books still prevail over-ebooks, according to new study." I'm a paper guy, while my beloved spouse has pretty much given herself over to e-media. Both of us still read ourselves to sleep pretty much every night. [By which I mean no disrespect!] This article--which I didn't technically read after clipping [I was satisfied to stop after reading the headline.], piqued my interest, so I did an inventory. I will only leave a summary & possibly go into more detail next time. You're welcome.
ON MY LAMP TABLE NEXT TO MY SIDE OF THE BED
- "A History of China" (book, started, not finished)
- "Eyewitness to World War II--Unforgettable Stories & Photographs from History's Greatest Conflict" (book, started, not finished)
- "Wild West" (magazine, started, not finished)
- 3 Nebraskaland magazines (not started), free copies obtained from NE State Fair, Game & Parks pavilion {Apr, May, June 2016}
OTHER BOOKS BY CATEGORIES
- History, including Civil War (4), WW I & II (3), American Revolution (1), History of the Old West (1), World History: 10
- Devotional, Theological, Spirituality: 7
- Biographies: 6
- Mental & emotional health: 5
- Nebraska: 3
- Memoirs: 3
- Fiction: 2
- Political: 1
- Miscellaneous: 1 GRAND TOTAL: 35
- NOTES: These books are not ranked by priority, length, date of copyright . . . even someone w/OCD has his/her limits . . .
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