Supercilious Saturday

Father's Day + Criminal Bears + Shameless Joke Stealing + Valuable Political Insight

Omaha World Herald (12/30/17):  "What to buy when during the year . . . June

• "Lingerie. Stock up on undergarments in June. That's when Victoria's Secret has been known to host its famed Semi-Annual Sale. The sale usually occurs in December also.
• "Gym memberships. Consider buying a gym membership during the summer, & don't forget to negotiate to get the best possible deal. Gyms may be more eager for sign-ups at this time.
• "Gifts for dad. you don't have to buy Dad's gift at full price. Expect Father's Day deals this month, especially the closer you get to the holiday on June 17. 

COMMENT:  To my children. As you thoughtfully consider appropriate Father's Day gifts for me, here are a few thoughts. First, lingerie would NOT be appropriate. Secondly, I don't need a gym membership, since I'm still enjoying a free month of cardiac maintenance, which includes both cardiovascular machines & weights, & after this month it will only cost me slightly more than a Y membership. Third, I don't wear t-shirts much anymore. I could use a gift certificate to Barnes & Noble.

Criminal Minds

Norfolk Daily News (5/24):  "Bear trashes car after getting trapped inside. What might be the world's hairiest vandal has destroyed the interior of a Connecticut woman's car. Linda Morad said she was house-sitting in Canton last FRI when she noticed her car lights on & heard strange noises. She called police. Officers found a full-grown bear that had somehow gotten into Morad's car & could not get out. Police opened a door, ran to the other side of the vehicle, & the bear scampered into the woods. The car's exterior was almost untouched, but the car's interior was torn to shreds. Morad said her insurance company tells her the vehicle is totaled. There was no food in the car, but Morad had taken some garbage to the dump earlier that day. She thinks the smell attracted the bear." COMMENT:  Don't leave garbage in cars. This is valuable advice to those who will be attending the Summer 2018 Hill Sister Bash at David & Carmen's Chalet on picturesque Little Island Lake in July. There are black bears to content with. Ask Carmen.

Dept. of Shameless Joke-Stealing

NDN late laughs (6/8):  "An 18-year-old has started a Go Fund Me page so he can achieve his dream of taking a bath in KFC gravy. So far, most of his donations have been provided by the Make a Sad Wish Foundation. [Conan]

Political Potpourri

I've assiduously tried to refrain from or at least minimize my political entries for the sake of my own mental health, but I am confident that my faithful readers would love to know what I think of the following.

NDN (6/7):  "Comedian Samantha Bee returned to her TBS show WED, apologizing again for using a crude epithet to describe Ivanka Trump. But she expressed anger that the ensuing controversy distracted from more important issues. President DT had called for her to be fired for what she said on last week's episode of 'Full Frontal,' but TBS accepted her apology." Here's what I think.

• This is an example of a "qualified" apology, i.e., "I'm sorry BUT." Qualified apologies are not count as actual apologies.
• Roseanne Barr had her show cancelled because of her racist tweet about Valarie Jarrett. She apologized but blamed it on ambien. SEE previous bullet point.
• Bee's vulgar slur, directed at Ivanka Trump, was just as heinous. She, too, should have been fired. Do I hear "double standard?"
• It's very unbecoming for both sides to try to excuse these types of insults. What's wrong is wrong.