Whimsy
From Omaha World Herald (12/29/15): "The 15 most intriguing Craigslist posts of 2015. No matter how high-tech the world becomes, it seems there is always a place for good ol' Craigslist. Do you need a couch, a boyfriend or a life-size nail-clipper costume? Look no further than the classified advertisements website, which turned 20 yrs old this year . . . Throughout the year, users nominate advertisements for a collection called the 'best of' Craigslist. Here are the 15 bests of the 'best of' this year.- "15. Free toilet bowl box: For your kids on Christmas morning, obviously. 'Imagine the excitement building w/such a huge gift waiting under the tree,' the post read, 'only to see it dashed when they rip off the paper & a photo of a potty is on the front.' [Mean-spirited but, I hate to admit it--I laughed when I read this one.]
- "6. Living Elf on the Shelf: 'For $100/hr I will come to your holiday party dressed as the Elf on the Shelf & sit in any location you assign me while I stare emptily at your guests for the duration of the event.'" [Very creepy but, I hate to admit it, I laughed when I read this one, too.]
- "Your smartphone is making you hallucinate.
- "New office chairs alert company how long employees sit."
From Reader's Digest Dec 2015/Jan 2016 "Eminem Wants What?!" "Match the bizarre dressing-room demands to the celebrity who allegedly made them:
- "Mariah Carey: A used-chewing-gum attendant (a person whose sole job is to dispose of the star's gum. [No matter how hard I've tried, I can't think of a clever way to phrase this for a resume'.]
- "Barbra Streisand: Toilet bowl filled w/rose petals. [Not surprised.]
- "Axl Rose: A square melon (evidently very popular in Asia). [Seriously, wouldn't it have been funnier if Axl would have demanded a toilet bowl filled w/rose petals?]
- "Prince: Every item must be covered in plastic wrap until this star removes said plastic wrap. [Prince & I have something in common . . . OCD.]
- "Madonna: Brand-new toilet seats in the bathroom. [What's demanding about that?]
- "Eminem: A koi pond." [In a dressing room?]
Criminal Behavior
From Norfolk Daily News (12/30/15): "Worker goes 'postal.' According to federal court papers, a postal worker was so overwhelmed by the number of gifts & holiday cards on his delivery route that he dumped hundreds in the trash. Queens postman Daniel Darby was charged w/unlawfully delaying & destroying the mail. Federal officials said he was so stressed by the increase in December mail that he bought 3 white garbage bags, stuffed the holiday mail into the bags & dumped them into the trash. They were discovered 2 days later. [It may have been my 284 Christmas cards & letters that pushed him over the edge.]There Is No Place Like . . .
New York?
Another tagline from Drudge Report (1/6): "Serial spitter terrorizes NYC." [I didn't bother reading the article.]
California!
Also from OWH (1/4): "Two-year twins: Babies born Dec. 31 & Jan. 1. Twins in San Diego are getting some attention because, though born just minutes apart, one has a birthday in 2015 & one in 2016. Jaelyn Valencia was born New Year's Eve at 11:59p. Her twin brother, Luis Valencia, Jr., arrived at 12:01a on New Year's Day. [Speaking from experience, the 2-minute differential may seem inconsequential, but birth order matters, especially when siblings are born in two different years.]Political Tuesday--Special WED Edition
More taglines from Drudge Report (1/6): [And, no, I didn't bother reading the articles.]- "Hillary Slams 'Bully' North Korea . . .
- "Rubio: Bill Wanted to Give Speeches There a Few Years Ago . . .
- "Clinton: IRS Had Good reason to Audit 'Floozy' Paula Jones . . .
- "Satellite Data Shows '15 Wasn't Close To Being Hottest On Record . . . "
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