whimsical WED
There Is No Place Like . . .
- Hawaii . . . From Omaha World Herald (2/8): "Crowds drawn to perfection at the peak spur restrictions. {Haleakala National Park, HI} Well before dawn each morning, throngs of tourists from around the world make their way to Maui's tallest peak, a dormant volcano, to see what Mark Twain called the 'sublimest * spectacle' he had ever witnessed. They drive up a long, winding road through the clouds to an otherworldly lava-rock landscape at 10,000 feet. Then they bundle up & take their place for a dazzling day-break show . . . " [Although we did make it to Maui several times during our idyllic stay in Paradise, we never made the drive to witness this enchanting vista. Look for it on our bucket list.]
- Iowa . . . Also from OWH (1/22): "Iowa club raises funds to illuminate crosses along I-80. Three crosses tower above Interstate 80 near Neola. The town's Lions Club chapter erected the crosses in June, inspired by a national organization. And now the group is working to illuminate them for nighttime drivers . . . " [From time to time I've been know to subject Iowanians to some good-natured hazing, so, KUDOs to Iowanians.]
- Iowa, redux . . . Ditto OWH (1/31): "Expert says invasive weed in IA should to be ignored by farmers. An invasive weed that can grow up to 7' tall is found in nearly half of IA's counties, & experts say farmers need to act quickly if the plant is found in their fields . . . " [At least it's not "weed." Take THAT, Coloradans!]
- South Carolina . . . From Lincoln Journal Star (2/10): "Orange gator puzzles residents. No one seems to know why there's an orange alligator in a pond near Charleston. Residents joke the gator used too much self-tanning lotion. Or maybe it's a fan of the Clemson Tigers, who are known for their orange colors . . . " [I wish I knew how to insert pictures, because a picture accompanies this news article, & by golly, this reptile is orange from snout to the tip of its tail.]
- Texas . . . From OWH (2/4): "Texas boy lifts toilet lid, finds rattlesnake hiding inside. Yes, it was a snake looking up. Snake-removal expert Nathan Hawkins said FRI that he was called to a home near Abilene last month after a boy lifted the toilet lid & was surprised to find an adult rattlesnake . . . " [I can neither confirm nor deny that this sign has been erected on the outskirts of town: "Abilene: Home of the Toilet Rattlesnake!"]
Nebraska!
- From Norfolk Daily News (2/15): Prairie dog law targeted by Chambers. NE's longest-serving lawmaker is once again trying to repeal a law that could allow county officials to kill black-tailed prairie dogs on private property if a neighbor complains . . . " [Just to show you that our unicameral doesn't waste its time on trivial matters.] *
- We've had high temps in the 60s & 70s this past week. Back to freezing temps starting tonight & thru the weekend. PLUS, a chance for snow, beginning tonight & into tomorrow. Depending on which forecast I choose to believe, we are in for anywhere from 1-3" to 6-10".
* Mr. Chambers represents a district in Omaha. I can neither confirm nor deny the presence of prairie dogs, black-tailed or otherwise, in the immediate confines of his district.
Fighting Fake News . . . You Be the Judge!
Once again, our relentless team of blog investigators seeks to ferret out sources of fake news, sparing you, the reader, unnecessary anxiety & confusion.- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Why Do Geese Honk? Georgetown Scientists Defy Conventional Wisdom
Researchers from the prestigious College of Bird Studies at Georgetown University are ready to make a startling announcement. Geese don't honk to encouragement. Geese honk because they are back street drivers! A reliable source within the Dept. of Goose Studies revealed this startling theory to a researcher from the Nebraska Cornhusker Blog earlier this week. Speaking on condition of anonymity, he said, "It's been thought for millennia that geese honk at the gander leading the V-formation in order to encourage him, as he leads the flock or skein. We've uncovered evidence that female geese are honking 'messages' similar to what you deplorable laypeople would consider 'backseat-driving.'This unimpeachable source, well-known within the wider scientific goose community, went on to say, "A study of honking, made possible by recently developed drone technology, has made it possible to identify distinct patterns of female geese communication. Examples include, 'Speed up! There's no reason to fly this slow over North Dakota!' 'You've had your left wing signal on for the last 20 minutes, but we're still headed right!' 'Why are we landing in this South Dakota cornfield when we've flown over a plethora of delectable Nebraska cornfields?' 'You just made a hard right turn without using your right wing signal!'"
When asked why he was unwilling to speak on the record, he seemed shocked. "Why would I speak on the record & be accused of sexism, junk science & misogyny? Why would I tarnish the reputation of our esteemed institution, not to mention trash my legacy?"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Racing Toward + Bracing For Retirement
My official retirement date of 3/1/17 is less than one week from today. I may need something to help occupy my additional free time . . . also a source of supplemental income. Here's an idea, compliment of the OWH (11/7): "Luxury meets forest in treehouse hotels. There's nothing like a treehouse to reawaken your childlike sense of wonder. Make it luxe & stick it in the middle of a tropical clime, though, & you've got a vacation fantasy fit for well-heeled adults. Here are five treehouse hotels--all new or recently expanded--where you can bring it all to life. >> Secret Bay, Dominica . . . Playa Viva, Juluchuca, Mexico . . . Acre, San Jose Del Cabo, Mexico . . . Papaya Playa, Tulum, Mexico . . . Hoshinoya, Bali, Indonesia . . . "PROs
We have four stately pine trees towering over the north end of our backyard . . . Our deck would only add to the ambience of a luxury treehouse hotel . . . When I was growing up, I always wanted a treehouse in the big maple tree in the southeast corner of our backyard, just outside our back porch . . . We could add an extra unit & live in it . . . Extra bedrooms when the kids & grandkids visit . . . State funds could be available, since a luxury treehouse hotel would only add to Norfolk's promotion as a tourist site . . . We would probably be the envy of our neighbors.CONs
. . . Or our neighbors might object to a major construction site next door . . . & our neighborhood might not be zoned for a luxury treehouse hotel . . . Norfolk may not be the first thing that comes to mind when people think "middle of a tropical clime" . . . A huge investment may be required, not likely to be completely covered by any state tourist grants . . . I'm not all that interested in helping to manage a luxury treehouse hotel, which would add to the burden of my better half . . . Four pine trees limits us to four luxury treehouse units, limiting potential income.CONCLUSION . . . Total fantasy. Fun to write about & that's about it.
Bucket List
- From OWH (11/7): "Luxury meets forest in treehouse hotels. There's nothing like a treehouse to reawaken your childlike sense of wonder. Make it luxe & stick it in the middle of a tropical clime, though, & you've got a vacation fantasy fit for well-heeled adults. Here are five treehouse hotels--all new or recently expanded--where you can bring it all to life. >> Secret Bay, Dominica >> Playa Viva, Juluchuca, Mexico >> Acre, San Jose Del Cabo, Mexico >> Papaya Playa, Tulum, Mexico >> Hoshinoya, Bali, Indonesia . . . "
- Hawaii Inter-Island Cruise, which would include side trips to Haleakala National Park on Maui, the drive to Hana, also on Maui, plus visits to Molokai & Kauai, which we never made it to while we enjoyed our idyllic sojourn in the Cook Islands.
Political Whimsy
- I've hinted * in my mental health MON entries that politically-charged FB items, punditry, & both partisan & drive-by media "news" aggravate my general anxiety news. One of my sisters-in-law, whose identify I will fiercely guard, ** challenged me to go a week w/o sourcing any of these thorns in the flesh. My week started on SAT 2/19. I'll let you know how this turns out.
- I didn't pledge to avoid inserting political whimsy into my blog. So, from the LJS (2/17): "Politics could spice up Academy Awards . . ." [Just for the record, I will be boycotting the Academy Awards this year. Not that I would be attending in person, but I will not be dialing the Academy Awards broadcast either, especially since Lois & I are enjoying the original MacGyver series on Netflix.] ***
* "Hinted? That's an understatement." Cornhusker State Blog Consultants
** I'll give you a hint. It was "Isty-Chray."
*** "Big whoop. This blogger dropped cable & direct TV & can only access Netflix & Apple TV. Plus, he can access sources by using high-speed Internet.
No comments:
Post a Comment